Guide: How to Replace All Your Food Intake to Just Mountain Dew and Doritos to Win an Xbox One

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13 Responses

  1. Covarr says:

    What if I buy the chips and don’t eat them but don’t eat anything else either? All those doritos are simply too much for me (and so is the Mountain Dew, unless diet is allowed). Not just too much Doritos, but flat out too much food.

  2. Anthony says:

    I was thinking about Dewing this. Now that I have a guide, the Xbone 180 will be mine.

    • pahkina says:

      Beware because if you do not carefully follow this guide(f*ck Inedia) you will become skeleton…

      Who needs game 4-packs when you can pack that punch in a mega size bag o’ dorritos?

  3. Worm says:

    So you mean I need to stop eating only Doritos and Coke and switch to Mountain Dew? Fucking gross.

  4. Kilroy says:

    I’m the CEO of a huge company and get paid $900/h. You losers can eat all your trash, I have a life so my mom will buy one for me.

  5. XxX_360_noscope_h3adshot_1337_XxX says:

    Yo man i was jus wonderin why dunt i jus buy a xbawx insted of spending 2000 buks on doridos n mountin dew
    its like 400 buks rite

  6. Transfat Pansexual Christian-to-Atheist Ponylover says:

    I’ve been living off nothing but Dew and Doritos for the past year. It’s healthy, it’s delicious, and I’ve even made some friends – the guys at the grocery store smile every time I walk in, and they scream, “HEY! It’s the Dorito guy!,” followed by laughter. Here are some helpful recipes I have created

    Dorito Soup
    -One 2-liter bottle of Dew
    -One bag of Doritos
    Pour Dew into pot. Bring to boil. Crush Doritos and sprinkle in.

    Dorito Dip
    -One liter of Dew
    -One bag of Doritos
    Pour ingredients into blender. Blender until smooth. Goes great with Doritos!

    Dew Fried Doritos (credit to Geoff Keighley)
    Use non-stick pan, or pour a little Dew in to prevent sticking. Wait until it gets hot – flick some Dew into it. If it sizzles, it’s ready. Dip each Dorito into some Dew. Fry 5 minutes on each side. Wash it down with a nice cold Mountain Dew.

  7. Jistuce says:

    “. This is why you have to eat the chips and drink the Dew, otherwise you will die and then you’ll never be able to play the Xbox One.”

    There ARE fates worse than death.

  8. Western says:

    I was considering buying vitamin supplements as well but then realised I’d be wasting precious Dew and Dorito money.

  9. Pro Life says:

    I tried this and now I am a proud owner of an Xbox 360! It only cost me a few bucks and both my legs, thanks Microsfootttttt

  10. MLG says:

    Microsoft trying to kill kids.

  11. BRODEWD420X69 says:

    Hell yeah brah, going to to score an xbox one with this awesome promotion. I always eat Doritos and do the dew to this is easy for awesome dudes such as myself. I love that xbox people know what I want and will do what it takes to get me a great console like the xbox one.

  12. Anonymous says:

    Should I use my children as a cheap alternative to paying friends and relatives to super charge my Dorito and Mountain Dew intake?